today,, was a fun back slap day for me; though my back hurt quite alot...
cant wait to watch the harry potter movie(:
so sad,, only two people responsed to my poll ):
nn,, hav to do research work for the debate thingy,, it sounds fun(:
it is abit like the arena show on channel 5 last tim,,
nn,,well,,nothing ....
HAISSH......................


i feel so ___,,
i felt so shuang when i lost them last tim ,,
cos i thot they were unworthy to be my friends,,
i was too reckless,,
n now,, i feel so sad,,cos i aint even top in their hearts anymore,,
i thot i made the right decision back then,,to follow another one,,
i lost em........nn now,, im juz an ordinary fren to them....
im thinking;is it bcos they had alrdy started to hate me,,
or bcos of my reckless nn immature decisions back then?
or,,is it bcos i was nvr fit to be one of them,,juz that they chose
me,a wrong one at the start of our nine yr old life back then.....
or i hurt them too much before.so much that they lost faith in me,,
i pretend to be happy,,
but when im back home,,
i feel a sense of hopelessness,,
i dunno wad kind of thingy this is,,
but when i go online,,
n i look at their blogs,,
i keep hoping that they would put me,,my blog link wiv a meaning that im
one of their bffs,,or their lloves section wiv my name rite there,,
all bcos of my desperation to prove to myself im still one of them,,
i hav been hoping so much for the past few months,,
so unknowingly,, i did not know i hav been doing this until now,,
not everyone has this sorta thing happen in their life,,
but i dun wanna be the 'special one',,
i hate being a victim of it.......
its making my life miserable,,
im not trying to tell anyone anything,,
i juz wan to let my heart out,,
nn dear diary,,
thanks for 'lending me ur ears',,
((: